Saying Yes to Desire: A Conversation on Vulnerability, Pleasure & the Body Sex Retreat
Photo Credit: Macherie Studios
Last week, I joined Simone Farschi on Instagram Live for a conversation that felt less like a casual chat and more like a threshold crossed—into deeper vulnerability, deeper truth, and a deeper honoring of the body.
If you’ve been following my work, you know that my world revolves around women’s pleasure, embodiment, and the reclamation of self through imagery, ritual, and sensuality. But this time, the tables are turning. In January, I’ll be stepping into something I’ve never done before—a Body Sex Retreat, founded in the lineage of erotic pioneer Betty Dodson.
And not as a photographer.
Not as a facilitator.
But as a participant.
Simone invited me in as both a guest artist and someone who would fully immerse herself in the experience. And our conversation left me both trembling with anticipation and grounded in purpose.
Why I Said Yes (Even Though It Scared Me)
I live in the Deep South—a place where sexuality is whispered about, coded, and often tucked behind closed doors. I grew up in the church. I know what taboo feels like in the body.
So when I saw Simone’s announcement for the retreat, my first response wasn’t confidence.
It was curiosity.
It was a flutter.
It was… a quiet “what if?”
Simone creates spaces that ask you to step into rawness immediately. In the Body Sex tradition, you arrive at the workshop and—before introductions are complete—you disrobe. There are no layers, no curated personas, no armor.
Just the body.
Your body.
In community.
And something about that invitation felt like a tug toward a part of myself I had been craving to meet again.
The Work Behind My Work
As a boudoir photographer and erotic embodiment guide, I hold space for women at their edges daily. I witness their trembling hands as they unzip a dress. Their breath quickening as they step into the studio. Their bodies negotiating the difference between desire and fear.
But here’s what I believe, wholeheartedly:
If I’m going to guide women into their bodies, I must be willing to go there myself.
Not behind the camera.
Not as the coach.
But as the woman.
It’s easy to hype someone up, to encourage them into confidence, to call forward their sensuality. It’s something else entirely to experience the vulnerability personally.
Simone reminded me on the live:
“You can’t photograph a naked room of women and not be naked yourself.”
That sentence landed in my chest like truth I’d been waiting to hear.
Why Community Matters in Pleasure Work
One of the most beautiful parts of our conversation was how much we both honored the collective.
Women heal in community.
Women awaken in community.
Women remember themselves in community.
At my yearly Vacation Boudoir School retreat, I’ve watched women transform before they ever stand in front of my lens—simply because they’re in a room together preparing, laughing, adjusting lingerie straps, hyping each other, reminding each other of their beauty.
Simone’s Body Sex Retreat magnifies that tenfold.
Imagine:
A room of women ages 18 to 60+
All shapes
All stories
All histories
All unclothed within five minutes
All choosing themselves
It’s primal.
It’s tender.
It’s sacred.
And it’s rare.
This is the part my spirit is craving most—the witnessing… and the being witnessed.
Desire as a Compass
During the live, Simone said something that keeps echoing in my mind:
“You listened to your curiosity more than your fear.”
That is exactly what this season of my life feels like.
A quiet initiation into deeper self-trust.
Desire has always been my compass—even when it has scared me, even when it has challenged the narratives I grew up with, even when it has stretched my identity as a mother, wife, and community leader.
And yet, desire has never led me astray.
It has always expanded me.
Bringing This Home: Marriage, Intimacy & Identity
I shared a bit about my marriage during the live—ten years in, and still discovering new layers of intimacy.
Recently, my husband and I traveled to Tampa for our first nude couples photoshoot. Being witnessed in our vulnerability, together and individually, cracked something open in us. Not just sexually—but emotionally, spiritually.
It reminded us:
We are individuals.
We are partners.
And we are always becoming.
When I told him about this retreat, he didn’t flinch. He was curious. He was supportive. He was open—which is a blessing I don’t take lightly, especially considering how many women aren’t granted that same freedom in their relationships.
But what matters most is this:
I’m not going for my marriage.
I’m going for me.
Because before wife, mother, business owner, facilitator—I am a woman with desires of my own.
What the Retreat Is (and Is Not)
The Body Sex Retreat is not a performance.
Not a spectacle.
Not a voyeuristic event.
It is:
a practice of meeting yourself without pretense
a ritual of slowing down enough to hear your own body
a deep dive into self-pleasure and self-knowing
a communal unmasking
a reclamation
Two days.
A room full of women.
A circle of mirrors.
A space of truth.
It is simple.
And it is profound.
The Invitation
The Body Sex Retreat takes place
January 17–18 in Nevada City, California
(MLK weekend)
It is open to women and vulva owners of all ages—from early adulthood to 60s+.
Simone is a masterful facilitator, and it is an honor to be part of this lineage—both as a student and as an artist.
If your curiosity is piqued…
If your body whispered “maybe”…
If your desire is louder than your fear…
I invite you to explore it.
You can find the details and sign up through Simone’s link (in her bio or mine), and if you have questions about the experience, my role, or traveling in, send me a message.
This journey is already reshaping me—and we haven’t even arrived yet.
May we all follow the thread of desire into deeper self-trust.
May we all say yes to the parts of us waiting to be met.
— Latoya Dixon Smith
The Private Viewings Journal
Cover Photo: Macherie Studios
